WYMTM Photo Competition – SCANDAL ERUPTS!
What would a contest in cycling be without controversy? It appears that the WYMTM photo competition was not immune to the ultra-competitive behavior of cyclists and may have been thrown into disrepute last night as the final votes were taking place.
Two photos in the competition have tested POZ for suspicious amounts of pocketcam. Following the UCI’s and WADA’s lead with how they handle these cases, names will be named and the accused will be burned at the stake until they can prove their innocence. WADA’s “strict liability” puts the onus upon the photographer to prove how their photo got tainted with copious amounts of pocketcam. We have already leaked this to the press and it’s only a matter of time before cyclingnews makes a circus out of this.
Just like Ricardo Ricco got done for CERA by testing for a marker put in the drug by the manufacturer (that’s actually a false claim, but anyhoo), there is EXIF metadata in every photo that tells the tale of what camera it was shot with:
“Construction Zone” EXIF data shows trace amounts of Canon IXUS 70 in its system. A corrupted memory card during manufacturing perhaps? Maybe a tainted latte before the ride? We’ve heard them all before…
“Hors Catégorie” EXIF metadata shows irregular amounts of Canon IXUS 130. Possible causes of this are when an iphone has an unborn twin or by eating pigeon pie made from steroid-fed birds the night before photographing.
The wild west of the interweb is not far from the turmoil in Afganistan where vote rigging is commonplace. I always wondered why democracies can’t be decided by simply voting on Polldaddy, but it appears the technology doesn’t have sufficient guards against voting from the same IP address multiple times. Irregular voting has propped up the placing of “Go Richie”. Could this have been Richie Porte himself doing this to negotiate a better contract for next season? Or maybe Richie really wanted that new set of C-4’s? We’ll never know…
In any case, the UCI manages to get away with sweeping a few cases under the carpet so I think the best way to treat “Go Richie” is by subtracting the irregular votes and putting it into it’s rightful place in the vote. It is indeed a very cool picture, and Richie can do no wrong.
That’s not all. It’s come to my attention that the leading photo in the voting “Sleeping In” is possibly not Dave’s wife’s ass, but DAVE’S arse! If this is true I will feel dirty and betrayed. This will be investigated further and more photos may be need to be submitted for identification purposes.
Final winners will be announced on Friday after the B samples are tested and a hearing goes through the Court of Arbitration of Sport (CAS).
All joking aside, there could be legitimate reasons for the EXIF data being changed such as batch processing, so I’ll wait to hear back from the photographers.
Also, the TdF route has been announced, so if you’re looking for a tour to book with, look no further than TopBike Tours. If there’s one thing I learned from the Tour last year, it’s get your travel plans together early!
Enjoy the beautiful spring weather today, even if it is from a cubicle!